An Apology to Our Gen Z Children

and a plea for their help …

To our son and daughters, we know the country is not as it should be. The childhood lessons we taught you are absent from public discourse. We regret that our generation enabled this situation. As you each enter adulthood, we ask your forgiveness and humbly seek your help.

We taught you to respect others, and gave you time-outs at young ages as reinforcement. Yet you see that toxic rhetoric has become ordinary and accepted, without consequence. Your grade school teachers would have shut down the juvenile insults you see from leadership and never would have countenanced ridiculing anyone less fortunate. There should have been unanimous outrage when leadership labeled a “monster” the first diverse vice presidential woman candidate, or was revealed to have bragged about grabbing women’s private parts. Shame on our generation for not railing against every caustic, racist, or misogynistic remark. The first presidential debate of your young adulthood should have been a celebration of democracy, not a farce with petulant interruptions that would shame high school debaters.

We taught you to embrace self-governance, like when you ran for student government. You should not have to enter adulthood with leadership that undermines the stability of free elections, implies any lost election was rigged, and refuses to embrace the peaceful transitions that have secured American freedoms since George Washington. Party loyalties today are wrongly elevated above the common good. Your Senate should not dramatically change its approach to vetting court nominees after a period shorter than your high school years. The United States should not prefer tyrannies to democracies, ignore bounties on our soldiers, or have love affairs with ruthless regimes that murder young Americans. You deserve sterner stuff than leaders who gas peaceful protestors for phony photo ops.

We taught you to be humble. “Narcissist” and “sycophant” were vocabulary words in our time, not routine descriptions of national leadership and advisers. We taught you the strength of “I’m sorry” and “I was wrong,” but leadership today denies any shortcomings. We are sorry you have witnessed evasions of condemnation when soldiers are referred to as “losers” and “suckers.” And public health should always take precedence over television ratings — that we even have to say this is embarrassing.

We taught you to study hard. You deserve better than historical ignorance. The leadership suggestion (undeniably intended to be serious) that people be injected with disinfectant bordered on unspeakable. We should never tolerate the public shaming of citizens wearing masks to meet civic responsibilities we owe each other. You deserve leaders who follow science and whose actions show care for our planet’s future.

We taught you that the truth matters. The only place where you should hear of “alternative facts” is in a seminar on dystopian literature. Your monthly tuition should not greatly exceed the $750 that that a “billionaire” pays annually in taxes. We taught you what “equal” rights means. American leadership should not sow discord, praise machine gunners on state capitol stairs, or threaten governors. The President of the United States should never refer to white supremacists as “very fine people” or charge hate groups to “stand by.”

We tried to teach you that actions have consequences. But it must appear that our generation rewards lies, hate, division, ignorance, incompetence, and myriad public sins. We apologize.

And yet, we taught you to trust us. Please do, because there is hope. Greatness and virtue remain among our people, as does resilience. It was within your lifetimes that our courts finally recognized freedoms long denied many of our fellow Americans. Not long ago we had public servants of both major parties who inspired with their words, roused us to action, and lifted our spirits. Not long ago the Republican Party had leaders like Senator McCain, who reminded a town hall participant that his opponent was a good man and that democracy embraces honest disagreements. It was President Obama who spoke of visions of hope to actual record inaugural crowds. As they showed, civil discourse is a virtue, not a vice.

We also taught you to take responsibility. Courtesy, democratic values, civic responsibility, and respect for truth above everything else — all those can be reinvigorated. It is true that your generation is bearing unusual burdens. But your time has come. Your vested right to vote is an unalienable gift ensured by centuries of sacrifice. You can show that actions indeed have consequences. Yours can be another Greatest Generation. As your parents, we want nothing more than for you to see a truly great America. Vote.

All our love,

Mom and Dad

John and Rammina Hamill live in the Chicago suburbs and have three children over 16